I thought I’d give a little more background about our financial situation. Maybe one of my readers will have suggestions for how my husband and I can better manage our money. I’ve thought about talking to one of my friends who is a financial planner, but honestly, I am too embarrassed to admit how much we owe. I feel like I have to be in better financial shape before I consult a professional, kind of like how some people feel like they have to lose weight before joining a gym, or others feel the need to clean their house before the housecleaner arrives.

We do have a budget. We just don’t stick to it very well. Here are the details:

Combined Monthly Income: $7,000 (This seems like a lot, right? So why are we always broke? A question to ponder. Also, this number varies based on my freelance projects.)

Rent: $1,700 (Kind of pricey, but we live near the beach, and this is about average for our area–neither of us have to commute too far, which is important to us. Also, we would go crazy if we moved into a smaller place. We are spoiled, but we also don’t have money for a month’s rent and security deposit if we were to move.)

Renter’s Insurance: $35 (Worth it. We had a pricey item stolen one time, and the insurance company came through for us.)

Cable, Internet, Phone: $135 (One of those bundle packages from the cable company–high-speed Internet is a necessity, since I often work from home).

Cell Phone Plan: $120 (Husband has an international BlackBerry so we can stay in touch when he’s overseas on business. We’re trying to get his company to cover part of the cost. This is the monthly cost for both our phones.)

Electricity: $65 (Seems high, considering we don’t have A/C and we always try to turn out extra lights.)

Car Payment: $300 (Luckily, my car is paid for.)

Car Insurance: $200 for both cars

Fuel: $250 (Gas prices are high in California)

Groceries: $450 (We could probably cut back here.)

Dining Out: $300 (We could definitely cut back here!)

Health Insurance: $235 (I have an individual plan because of a previous bout with cancer.)

Student Loans: $210 (Mine is almost paid off!)

Savings: $100 (I am trying to build an emergency fund. So far, we are up to $600. Better than nothing.)

So, after all those bills are paid, we should have $3,110 left every month. I try to put at least $1,000 a month toward our credit cards, so we should have a nice $2,000 cushion for more savings, entertainment, and additional expenses, but it never seems to work out that way. Obviously, I am not doing a good job of tracking where all of our money goes.

Any advice?

I decided to start this blog because I finally got the nerve to add up how much my husband and I owe on all of our credit cards.

$23,095.97.

That’s a lot of money. Money that I don’t know how we’ll be able to pay off. My husband has a good job, and I am working on a lucrative freelance project right now, but it’s going to take a long time before we are debt-free.

I admit it. We are bad at managing our finances. We were practically debt-free (well, aside from student loans) upon our marriage three years ago. But then we splurged a little too much on the honeymoon. And then we decided to buy new living-room furniture. And then we needed a new bed. And then we wanted to go out to dinner with our friends. And then I lost my job and decided to be a full-time freelancer. And then we realized that it was tough making it without regular paychecks, but I also couldn’t find a decent-paying full-time job. And then my husband lost his job, and neither of us had any money coming in for nearly four months. And then we moved to Southern California for my husband’s new job, and everything from the U-Haul rental to our first month’s rent went on the credit cards (“convenience checks,” baby!). And now we are trying to face the sober reality of too much debt.

I manage our finances, and I’m not good at saying, “No, we’re not going out to dinner. We can’t afford it.” It’s far too easy for me to just reach for the plastic. And my husband is the same way, so we indulge each other and get deeper and deeper into debt. In fact, my husband doesn’t know how much we owe. I’m embarrassed to tell him, even though it’s as much his fault as it is mine.

So I started this blog hoping that my readers would help me find some willpower and whip me into shape. At least I finally know how bad the damage is. I’ve made a list of all of our credit cards, I’ve transferred balances around to get lower rates, and I have devised an order in which the bills should be paid off. It’s going to take a long time. It’s not going to be fun. But in the end, it will be worth it.

In the meantime, I am open to comments, criticisms, and suggestions. Yes, I know that running up this much debt is stupid. I know that I am compromising our long-term financial security. I know that at this rate, we’ll never be able to buy a house. (Not like we could at these prices anyway–we live in Orange County, California.) So that is why I am embarking on a mission to clean up my financial life. This is the one place where I will post the unvarnished truth. The one place where I can be honest about how bad it is, and how hard we need to work to make it better. Here are the facts:

Amount owed: $23,095.97

Husband’s projected yearly income: $70,000

My projected yearly income: $45,000

Rent: $1700/month

Car payment: $300/month

Student loan payments: $190/month

We’re a lot better off than a lot of people. We actually have good credit, since we pay more than the minimums on our cards each month. But I don’t want to be in debt for the rest of my life. This is the first step. It’s going to be a long journey.